Of course men think some women are crazy. That’s because some of them are. Some men are douches. This is life. But justifying the crazy actions of women makes that particular man just as crazy. What do I mean? The story unfolds…
I was lamenting to a guy friend about my recent dating woes. I’m convinced that every girl needs one guy friend (not gay) who can shed some honest insight into the goings on inside the male brain. Us girls can make up tons of excuses as to why a guy did this or said that but let’s be real. As much as we think we do we have absolutely no idea. He made two very good points.
When we left off last time in the dramatic saga of the dating life of X, she had just been unceremoniously dumped by the Kid. Well, about 5 minutes after that stunner of a call, she decided to text Mystery Man.
Some background: I had met this guy over a year ago, we had a great date, then…nothing. 6 months later another date and an amazing kiss and again…nothing. What gives? Date three happened shortly before the Kid. Also great, also silence again. You’re thinking exactly what I did. Why keep going out with a guy who seems to show absolutely no continual interest. Answer: boredom. The dates were always great so why not get out and enjoy myself when he did materialize?
Just had a complete WTF moment. The guy I was dating for a little over a month calls to see if I was coming to happy hour tomorrow. We made plans, told him I’d see him tomorrow, and ended the call. Exactly two minutes later he called to dump me. Huh? Seriously that’s all I’ve got as a response. I think the biggest shock about the whole thing was that this was the guy who told me that he really saw this going somewhere.
The other night a friend of mine called and begged me to go to 88 Keys. She had a Groupon that was expiring and why not try a new place. Well, the two of us walking into the bar lowered the median age about 20 years. We looked at each other, shrugged, and laughed. Hey, free prosecco is still free prosecco, though our chances of returning are slim.
If you’ve been reading my stuff consistently, you may think that I have a penchant for dating douchebags. Well, you’re right, but it’s not by choice. I mean, I don’t seek out the douches of the world with grand hopes of changing them. Some of them are harder to spot than you’d think. There are more Bentley’s out there in the world than I’d like to admit. But there are times where I actually meet someone who doesn’t suck.
Judging people is wrong. You can’t really know someone from a few conversations or events, which is especially true in dating. The only reason men and women work is a mutual feeling that is shared despite those weird things the other person does. It’s up to you to accept them or move on. But those first few conversations and dates are imperative. Men, I want to impart some valuable advice that may help. There is a fine line between being a cool guy that we want to hang out with and someone whose red flags are too much to overlook. We know you cannot be defined by one personality type, but here are a few that frankly scare the crap out of us.
By the time this gets published, we will be in the throes of the Royal Wedding. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you’ve been living under a rock for the past five months. Please tune to any one of the female targeted Cable stations immediately. Today all programming will be an ad nauseum recount of Kate and William’s wedding littered with Charles and Diana references and anything and everything royal. If you woke up before dawn to catch the nuptials, good for you. I was peacefully asleep. King Google will do well enough to catch a glimpse of the most important piece of news this week – what Kate wore. Much more important than the deadly tornadoes that ripped through the U.S.
I have a splendid idea. What if, when you absolutely know after a date or two that you weren’t into the other person, that…you…told that person? Gasp! I know! What normally happens? Silence. We’re all guilty of it, even me. It’s easier to just ignore the “problem” and hope it goes away than to actually speak up. You dodge phone calls and text messages and hope they get the silent hint.
Let’s be honest. Dating blows. You devote so much time and effort into getting to know someone and most of the time it doesn’t work out. There’s something off, so you move on. Now, this is easy when the investment is minimal.
Take for instance, “Shady.” From the first time I met him something seemed, not…right. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but the bs level felt rather high. I mean, please tell me how many energy traders leave work every day before the market closes? Or the fact that he kept promising to take me to dinner at some of the hottest restaurants in town, but we managed to end up splitting a pizza at Collina’s. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but the promise to fulfillment level left much to be desired. Also, you can’t impress me by promising to wisk me off to South Beach for the weekend. Before I’m going to spend any extended period of time with you, I have to be sure I’m not going to be bored to tears. Needless to say he was an easy one to say goodbye to.
