September 15th, 2010

Fall? I’m Still Sweating

Not a lot of things really get under my skin; the things that do annoy everyone: bad driving, potholes, people who ignore common courtesy, and stepping in gum. But there’s one thing that I did not realize got under my skin until this past Sunday. I was walking into the grocery store and there were pumpkins all around the entrance waiting to be sold. I get inside the store and what do I see? Fall decorations and Halloween candy. Really? I just sweated out a good two pounds on my walk from the car to the store and these people are pushing fall on us already?

It must be some kind of sick joke like a ski slope in Dubai or putting bright lights outside of someone’s window in the middle of winter in Barrow, Alaska. To top it all off, I was watching the weather report this morning and they were pointing out that a “fall like front” would be likely to hit Houston in a week or so. Just rub it in a little more, why don’t you.

Houston is a great city, we have a lot going for us and I enjoy living here, but I’m going to be completely honest: I live for and I thrive on the fall season. When the humidity drops significantly and we see temperatures in the 70s and 80s (and if we’re really lucky, the 60s), that’s what I love. It gives me and, I’m sure everyone reading this, a chance to be outside for extended periods of time without needing gallons of water or an extra t-shirt close by. Just like people in the north love spring time, we love fall because it marks the end of our “difficult” months. It invigorates us and prepares us for the two weeks of winter we’ll have to endure.

My only qualm is with businesses and people who try to turn the end of summer into fall. It’s as if they think by adorning their store with reds, oranges and browns, they can influence the weather. According to the calendar, the first day of fall is Wednesday, September 22. If people want to start selling fall goods then, go for it. If it’s still 97 and 100% humidity after that date, in my opinion, it is not fall yet. It’s summer’s vengeance because apparently an armadillo somewhere saw his shadow (then quickly ran into traffic).

Even with preemptive arrival of all things fall, I like to stay in a good mood by reminding myself that while the northeast is digging out from a blizzard that dropped six feet of snow, I’ll be outside in shorts, more than likely having a picnic. Suck on that Boston.

— Stephan

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