October 25th, 2010

Quitting Smoking: A Training Journal (Week 1)

I’m trying to cut things down in increments of five. Now if that’s the correct way to go about this, I have no idea. A doctor did tell me that was what method my madness should take, so I’m following her advice. Amazingly, I mostly met that goal (unless I have managed to lie to myself each day, which happens to be quite likely).

Day 1 (Monday)
My favorite thing about quitting smoking is the new and inventive excuses I can find for having a cigarette. Take today for instance. The internet went down at work. Not only does that mean I can’t watch the newest kitty videos, but my work email is unresponsive. I can’t be unproductive OR productive. The only thing I have to work with is the butt can outside.
Dalliance Count: 10

Day 2 (Tuesday)
I feel like I slept walked (sleep walked? slept walk?) this morning to the coffee pot and had lit the cigarette by the time I had the grounds out of the filter. That’s probably not a good start to cutting back…
Dalliance Count: 14

Day 3 (Wednesday)
It’s important to surround yourself with good influences during the quitting process, but when those who will keep you honest turn their backs… SMOKE ‘EM IF YOU GOT ‘EM! (as they used to say in the field).
Dalliance Count: 12


Day 4 (Thursday)
Dinner at Zimm’s Little Deck has a bit of conversation about quitting. My non-smoking friends have always relied on me to have a pack at their disposal when they felt the bi-monthly urge for a cigarette. That’s all about to change. Or will it? Can I get away with keeping a pack in my glove compartment for the benefit of my friends? Oh, yes, readers, that is quite the roundabout validation for hanging on.
Dalliance Count: 9

Day 5 (Friday)
Ahhhh, the weekend. Did you know that we have 52 national drinking holidays in the USA? Yep. Well, add Cinco de Mayo, St. Patrick’s Day and Arbor Day and you get 55. Burning only three cigarettes between 8PM and 2AM is quite the feat. Just don’t count the number of times I stole a puff from a smoking friend. Sneaky!
Dalliance Count: 12

Day 6 (Saturday)
Remember that whole “keep a pack in the car for special occasions” validation above? Well, I took it for a ride on Saturday night. My only payback for allowing my friend a cigarette (or two) was that I had to light it for them. That first drag of the cigarette is always the most delicious anyway.
Dalliance Count: 11

Day 7 (Sunday)
I have nothing to say that isn’t stated below in the “Dalliance Count”. BOOYAH! Five cigarettes. Two in the morning. Two in the afternoon. One before calling it a night. Does this show progression? Barely. Tomorrow is Monday and it means much coffee, commuting and stealing away from computing. God bless the work week and its cigarette breaks.
Dalliance Count: 5

— Paul


Jciolli — Monday, October 25, 2010 5:35 pm

Day 8 (monday)
Fuck this. I quit quitting.

Scotchenol PM — Monday, October 25, 2010 9:09 pm

Cold turkey regimen:
Super black coffee
Gum til lunch
Healthy lunch and beers
Gum til gym
At gym exercise til exhaustion
Go home take 3-4 Tylenol pm
Drink scotch until u fall asleep

Repeat for 2-3 weeks.
Keys: beers at lunch. Exhaustion. Tylenol pm. Scotch.
4+ years clean.

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