September 21st, 2010
RedBuds Membership Drive and Date Auction: Biography of an Auctionee
Dating in this city is about as hard as it is to find shade. Luckily, this week you can kill two birds with one stone. Let me rephrase- you can bid on one little birdie for your arm and find the other bird a secure branch on which to perch. On Thursday night, from 7PM until 10PM, RedBuds will be hosting the eighth annual Membership Drive and Date Auction at The Gallant Knight.
RedBuds is the young professionals’ branch of Trees for Houston, an organization which aims to do as they’re named. The parent group has been around for over 25 years and the young shrubs of RedBuds have been raising awareness and funds for almost a decade. At last count they have planted almost 400,000 trees and saplings in Houston, but on Thursday it will be those up for auction that are trying to shine through the canopy.
Below, find seven mini-bios of your 14 potential dates:
The girl from Alabama that went to the Ivy League is ready for your winning bid as long as you promise not to wear jorts on the first date. Pluses include being a ninja, serving you fries with truffle salt, Jack Daniels body shots and keeping your mouth shut at the movies. Unless of course Elaine’s given you the green light for a kiss at said movie. That’s a whole different story.
A transplant from the Northeast, Jeremy likes the word kerfuffle (which happens to be a legitimate word). If you’re a taller lady looking for a man, you might want to pass on him. Jeremy finds the ones long in the legs and torso to be a bit intimidating. But if you’re tall, want to visit India, love a good telenovela and have a passion for “really. great. hair.” then Jeremy will look past abundance of height.
Let’s get one thing out in the open immediately: If you’re an Affliction-wearing, cigarette-smoking hunk of man meat, Licia is not interested, no matter how many crunches you did this morning. That rules out 85% of The Loop Scoop staff as possible bidders. However, you pleasant, Polo-wearing boys who love Christmas and Sandra Bullock will serve as a good choice of mate for Licia.
If a moonlit walk on the beach were one of the date packages, Sarah would be fighting tooth and nail for it. Unfortunately, you’ll be leaving the dune buggy in the garage if you win her arm for a date. It makes sense that the resident makeup artist is a big fan of Halloween, but is she one that dresses up like a fairy tale pixie or a zombie devil? Fellas, you can find out that and many other fun facts if your bid is the winner.
You should know that not all of New Jersey is how MTV would like you to believe. Some good prospects who love and respect TCU football, help old ladies cross the street, hate jury duty and shoot cats… wait…. Matthew likes shooting cats? Ladies, I’m sorry, but I think you’re going to have to fight me for this one. Any mercenary of felines deserves to be a friend of mine, even if I have to bid on him during a date auction.
This TV reporter has a passion for her career and is looking forward to spending significant time outdoors once fall settles in. If you told me that RedBuds would be auctioning a date with a Persian who loves Christmas and Greek food, I would have called you crazy. Well, my friend, I’m the crazy one. That’s exactly what we have here. Oh, and an insider’s note: Hasti loves breakfast (and I’m assuming she likes it served to her in bed). Don’t go rushing into your “what are you doing… tomorrow morning?” pick-up lines though. Leave those at home.
Jamie and Leslie
For the aspiring bidder, Jaime and Leslie are being auctioned off as a pair. Don’t get ahead of yourself, buddy boy. You can’t handle the both of them on your own. Our advice is to grab a friend and compile your money. Win your way to Leslie’s heart by bringing her powdered donuts or a good book while remembering to bring Jamie a stuffed penguin to satisfy her love of the flightless beasts. They’re both into Christmas, so I’m going to recommend a Santa Bowling date at Lucky Strike.
Come out in force to The Gallant Knight on Thursday night. Maybe you’ll be lucky enough to win a date with one of these lovely lasses or gents. Each date will be paired randomly with one of the packages that have been donated. The list of philanthropic restaurants and organizations covers a wide swath. We’d like to point out that three of this list made it on to our “First Dates in Houston” list from back in July, so we at The Loop Scoop fully endorse the below date packages.
Freebirds Unplugged Weekend Brunch
Houston Rockets game and dinner for two at the Red & White Wine Bistro
Laurenzo’s El Tiempo Cantina
51Fifteen (in the Galleria above Saks)
Quattro at the Four Seasons for brunch
Lucky Strike Lanes