November 25th, 2010

Thanksgiving Special: I’m Damn Thankful for Houston

As we take some time to sit around with our families, friends and third cousins twice removed, we got to thinking about what we’re thankful for about Houston. From over the freeways to under the flower beds, everywhere we turned had yet another thing for which to thank the mighty Sam Houston and his juggernaut army.

I’m thankful for:
80 degree weather in November. For all of the Northerners cursing our little rain-forest paradise—we’ll be laughing from our park picnic in daisy dukes and spandex tops come Christmas Eve.

I’m thankful for:
The vastness and diversity of the Greater Houston Area. Beaches, Woodlands, Spanish moss covered bayous, Mexican, Vietnamese, Italian, Texan, fancy couture, taco trucks, rolling plains, seafood, wine country, Soul, pine, oak, crowded, deserted, prosperity, a willingness to give, and so much more comes to mind when I take stock of this city.

I’m thankful for:
Houston jobs. The slumping economy hits close to home this time of year when we’re torn between meeting societal expectations and finding comfort in the simple things like a warm bed and a good meal. Thankfully, our city’s employment rate remains relatively solid and many of her people can reside in comfort. Recently pronounced the 14th strongest job market in the U.S., I’m grateful that Houston harbors so many occupational opportunities. On the other side of that coin, I’m also thankful that those prospects are balanced with multiple outlets for charity, and that Houston’s opportunities to receive do not outweigh its chances to give and assist those who are struggling.

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I’m thankful for:
Bat-shit crazy drivers who use Houston streets and freeways as their personal therapy sessions. The lousier and faster they drive, the more my odds improve that the cops will not pull me over.

I’m thankful for:
Emergency rooms. When you get cracked in the head while walking around one of Houston’s not so nice neighborhoods, the fine men and women who work at Houston area hospitals will do their best to get you all sewn up.

I’m thankful for:
Roaches. Before moving back to Houston, I lived in a beautiful city in the Pacific Northwest. Near the end of my tenure there, I had to find a place to live for a couple months before high-tailing it back to Houston. A craigslist search landed me with a seemingly normal woman, her two cats, and her reasonable asking price for rent in a cool neighborhood. Within a few weeks I began waking up to scratching noises in the walls. Then I walked into the kitchen to find Cat 1 sitting by a dead rat the size of a coke can on the kitchen rug. I inquired with the woman, and she responded with something about “those crazy cats” and a story of how her last roommate had once had to “beat an intruding rat with a broom”. Come again? My impending move happening sooner rather than later, I decided to calm down, laugh it off, and not eat in the kitchen ever again. A week later I walked into the bathroom, lifted the lid of the toilet, and there, bobbing like the Titanic, was a dead rat whose size rivaled small dogs. I ran upstairs, sputtering and waving my hands to my landlord, the Rat Whisperer. She comes downstairs, takes a look, and proceeds to try to flush it. It doesn’t go. As she tries again, she proceeds to tell me not to worry, it’s just a “juvenile” and that she’s had three rats in her toilet of late, one which was alive and she just “popped the lid down on its head”. I looked at her incredulously, and she explained that she didn’t want to tell me because “she didn’t want to freak me out”. As far as uninvited indoor guests go, our Houston roaches have nothing NOTHING on rats.

I’m thankful for:
All the Loopsters out there that read us once a day; once a week; once a month; or, hell, even if you just kinda heard about The Loop Scoop once from your friend’s cousin’s college roommate. You’ve all made it a joy to throw our inane banter at the interwebz to see if it will stick. The last year and a half has been a fun little ride through desperation and elation. So I raise my glass of cranberry sauce to you (yes, an entire class of Ocean Spray gelatin, don’t judge me) to thank each and every one of you for your readership, comments, support and kind words. Even if you hate us, thank you for knowing we exist.

I’m thankful for:
That really, really, really creepy picture of a little girl in a sailor costume petting the turkey she’s about to eat. Wow. Ten bucks says she killed that bird all on her own. She’s got the look of a cold blooded killer, I’m telling you.

— The Loop Scoop

Comments

Cassi — Thursday, November 25, 2010 11:39 pm

Nice. Gave me warm fuzzies about H-Town.

Dave — Friday, November 26, 2010 1:59 am

I’m thankful for articles like these that continue to bring a smile to my face. Happy Thanksgiving!

Parisa — Monday, November 29, 2010 9:46 pm

I’m thankful for you!

Hildy — Tuesday, November 30, 2010 3:37 pm

I’m thankful for this article and a certain Irish pub that serves delicious pizzas. God, I miss Houston.

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